“Someday” isn’t Coming

It’s just absolutely crazy that I was sitting there meal planning in front of the fire with my little family around me, and I just happened to grab my phone to look up some recipes and I saw a friend post about Kobe Bryant.  What was a peaceful and normal Sunday suddenly turned our minds into grief, worry, frustration and determination.  I will be honest and say that I did not follow Basketball, nor did I know much about Kobe and his life.  I didn’t know he had four beautiful daughters and was still married to his stunning wife.  I knew he was a ball player, but I didn’t realize the dedication and determination he put forth to become the best. Of course I know that pro athletes are a special breed and in order to achieve that level of success, well you must sacrifice a lot.  I also did not realize how much my husband looked up to a man such as Kobe Bryant.  To say that it was a somber evening is putting it lightly.  I’m not sure how anyone could have a dry eye after thinking about that horrific crash, with those 9 people and especially him sitting there with his daughter.  I don’t recall which reporter said it best, but heroes aren’t supposed to die.  We are supposed to be able to watch them grow old and live out their lives.  In a sense he just started this next chapter of his life it seems…after retiring from playing basketball he was working with his daughter to help her live out her dreams.  He just had a baby last year.  It all just makes no sense; when I hear this news it just stops me in my tracks because we are not promised tomorrow. So after the tears dry and the day to day routine sinks back in, we are asking ourselves what is that we are going to do?  Nothing changes if nothing changes.

If you wrote out your goals for 2020, do you look at them?  Have you written down action steps to achieve any of them?  Are you pushing yourself a little further than you would in 2019?

What is your why?  What purpose do you have to get up, get out of bed and fight for your day to be better than before?

I know that Joe and I have been hugging the kiddos extra tighter, saying I love you a little more, and though we never take our time for granted, it just seems to hit you a little more when a tragedy like this strikes.  Be in the moment.  Yes, BE IN THE MOMENT.  Enjoy the kiss goodbye.  Look your child in the eyes as you hug her.  Call your mom! Have the coffee date with the friend you keep meaning to see.  Share and spread your love and don’t think twice about it.  Show everyone how much they matter to you, how much you care.

Even something as simple as getting up earlier has been impacted by Kobe.  My alarm goes off and I don’t want to get up out of my warm cozy bed and tip toe down the stairs and feel the cold tile floor on my feet.  But I get to hear my alarm.  I get a whole new day in front of me.  I feel like you can either sit around and complain about how awful life is, how unfair things can be and how miserable you are (aka be a victim) or you can show some respect, grab life by the balls and go after all that you desire.  #sorrynotsorry

If your eyes opened today, you get to choose.  We are not promised tomorrow and we have no idea when our time is up, so instead of worrying about dumb petty stuff (which at the time will not seem dumb or petty) and focus on the bigger picture.  Dream your dream and then lay out your plans and just start.  Do something.  Do it badly.  Don’t worry about being perfect or what you may look like doing it, just go freaking do it.

The time is now.

 

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Rachel Hollis Instagram

Free to be ME

This photo captures the beauty of life still moving, in this case the sun setting, and yet not being totally overwhelmed, consumed and bogged down by the daily demands.

Every morning the sun rises, and every evening the sun sets.  We wake up, have endless amounts of ideas running through our minds, activities to attend, meals to prepare and eat, people to take care of, books to read, obligations that need to be fulfilled and duties to be performed.

I’ve always thought of myself as a happy person, but I will admit my emotions ran me most of the time.  I have always felt so damn close to being exactly where I want, and what I want, but then something would happen and I’d lose that feeling.  Well, since working with my Life Coach Lindsay Preston in her Life Luvers Course and then followed it up with her Unstoppable Woman program, I can honestly say to myself and to the world, I have unlocked so many doors.

As I try to put into words the power of the work that I have done, it almost feels impossible.  There were parts when it was super hard and I certainly did not like opening up some old wounds, but with her help, Lindsay gave me the tools to heal myself for once and for all.  I’m not saying I won’t have past issues re-surface, but now that I know what to do, I no longer fear them.   Most importantly, I learned to forgive, especially myself.

I mentioned that I was to do three 21 Day Habits.  You guys, I did them.  ALL. THREE!! It was easy to do, but it would have been oh so easy not to do as well.  I did my daily yoga, even when I was ready for bed and pushed it until the very end of the evening, I still pulled out my iPad and did some goodnight yoga stretches.  I blogged every day for 21 days, even if it was just a quote and photo.  I also repeated my mantra to myself every day, for 21 days straight, “I am free to be me.”

Do you know what happened?

  • I became more calm and got mad/frustrated less.  (ie. not yelling/snapping at kids or dogs)
  • I drew boundaries in my life where I realized there needed to be some.  (Business wise, familial, friendships)
  • I gained a sense of confidence in my writing, opening up and sharing poetry here, no longer caring if anyone liked it or not.
  • I got really intentional with my time, making my 24 hours in my day extremely valuable to me.
  • I stopped feeling the guilt if I let someone down (aka the people pleaser in me) when I realized I simply cannot do it all.
  • I learned to love my body, the way it is, even if it’s not perfect.
  • My relationship with my husband has gotten even better, and I have to say we have a great marriage, but this work has improved it even more so!
  • I am so attune with God, mother nature, the universe.
  • I no longer hold grudges or question, “why me?”  I started asking, “What is this teaching me?”
  • My weird heart palpitations are completely gone.  The Dr sent me home with Lexapro, told me I had bad anxiety…I have felt more zen than ever before, and life is anything but smooth sailing. (hello house fire at one of properties)
  • I’ve opened up even further to our business and am becoming more confident as I step further into this entrepreneur role.
  • I am just so “in flow” as I always call it.  I just feel lighter — and not like lbs, just not a sense of heaviness weighing me down.
  • I can feel myself slipping into my “IMG” and can pull myself back into my authentic self with the proper tools Lindsay taught me.

 

Lindsay will be running Life Luvers again LIVE starting on Monday 9/9 and they can use your code to get $20.  This is so powerful when you do it amongst a group of women!  The energy that flows is so contagious and so much growth can happen in such a short time.  If you are at all intrigued, hop over to her site  (www.LindsayEPreston.com) to take her coaching assessment to see if you are good to work together so you can get in that live group!!  Don’t forget to use the code JENN20 when you sign up, and save $20!

I know it seems like a lot of work, and I won’t lie, putting in the time to better myself was not always easy…but if you just take it one day at a time, one step at a time, I can promise you that life will get better, things seem to get easier, and you’ll gain a clarity that you’ve perhaps only dreamed of.

I started with two 90 Day Goals at the start of this Unstoppable Woman course.

Goal 1:  Improve my time management. At the start of this course, I gave myself a “3” out of 10.  I felt it was reasonable and attainable to achieve my goal. I wrote, “By the end of unstoppable, I will be at a 10.  I will feel less chaotic, and there will be a flow with my days. —- WOW!  I can say that I am there.  I feel in control, even on the days I have zero control, I am still in flow with my crazy.  (Owning your own real estate biz has so many unexpected twists!)

Goal 2: Improve my communication about me.  I will be okay with celebrating wins.  I gave myself a 6 on the scale at the start of this program.  At the end of 90 days, I won’t hide/skirt around my needs, wants and desires.  At the end of Unstoppable, I will be free to be me.  –again, WOW!!  I would say here I am at a 10.  I no longer hold back in fear of what others may think, say or do.  I honestly display my feelings, thoughts and stand firm in my beliefs.  My communication has honestly improved in all important relationships in my life and I feel nothing but gratitude and abundance, and of course, love.

I am just wrapping up the final weeks of this course, and just wish everyone could put in this kind of work to better themselves.  I’ve read countless self-improvement books, listened to audio, watched a ton of motivational speakers, but none of them have given me this literal step-by-step guide of how to get to the other side.

Mindset Matters

It’s Friday beautiful friends!!

The sun is shining.

Hubby is at the land with Bailey girl.

I’m sitting on our back deck doing what makes my heart happy: writing.

Baby girl is at school, learning and having fun on her “Culture Day” and I’m allowing baby boy tablet time while I feed my soul.

It’s not easy, this whole self-care thing.  We have been so engrained to work, push, hustle, care for others, put everyone else first, bla bla bla bla. But friends, YOU MATTER.  Every time I see another mama doing some self-care I just wanna jump through the screen and hug her.  Yes girl.  Be a queen.  Meditate. Enjoy that glass of wine.  Do some yoga. Read that book.  Lay in the sun.  Relish in the massage.  Take that workout class. High five!!!  It’s amazing at how much more you can provide to the rest of the world after you’ve taken care of you.

I’ve been very attuned lately with the universe and the quiet messages it’s sending me.  This week is of course all about gratitude, but also just a little bit more. 

I was once told it (in so many words) it’s amazing that I cook all that I do in my not so fancy kitchen.  And I get it.  I don’t have 10 foot ceilings, white cupboards, light grey walls, marble countertops and tons of island space, double ovens, Viking stoves– you get the picture.

However, what I do have is a passion for taking care of my loved ones and a love for creating delicious meals that fuel our bodies.  I love chopping, stirring, mixing, baking and of course eating! When I play Frank Sinatra, pour a glass of wine and get to cooking, it never feels like work. Sure, I would love a big new fancy kitchen with all the bells and whistles, and it’s certainly on my vision board, but the fact is I know to enjoy the now.

At my chiropractor appointment this week we talked about this.  I feel like he not only aligns my back/body properly but also my heart and mind!  (Is it just me, or do you really find some people with the BEST energy and wanting to surround yourself with them all of the time?!) Anyway, he lives in a modest home in a nice, but busy area, and has his practice in the home he resides in.  He went on and on to tell me how much he’d love a big fancy house, new this and new that, but it also felt really great to be in the financial spot he’s in.  His son is going off to college in the Fall and essentially they are debt free at the moment.

I say all this because we can all get caught up in wanting more, the best of the best, and being unhappy and unfulfilled with where we are in life and what we have.  Now I’m not saying to not dream big and crush some big old goals, but if you’re not enjoying what you have right now, or feeling gratefully abundant in all that you do have, maybe your mindset needs a little shift.  God will not give more to us if we aren’t ready.  If you find yourself looking left and right and feeling sorry for yourself, it’s time to take a step back and truly be happy for all the blessings in your life.

It ebbs and flows, and there are times I wish we already had our home built on our land with a swimming pool and all the fixings, but I have learned that we must time in the timing.  It will happen when it’s supposed to happen.  Life seems to be one big juggling act with so many moving parts; but beauty will always be in the silence.

The sticky hands of little ones who helped bake with you in your not so fancy kitchen.

The cuddles of your small dog on cold day.

The peace and tranquility of enjoying what makes your heart happy.

The tapping of your fingers on the keys of a laptop.

The birds chirping sweet songs.

The warmth of the sun and the cooling of the breeze.

The radiant colors of the potted flowers.

The smile from your significant other after a long hard day.

These moments are what make us.

So if you’re feeling a little off, make a list of things that bring you joy and take some time to check them off. Go volunteer, if that’s on your heart.  Go bake your friend some cookies.  Visit that grandparent.  Send your mom a sweet text.  Write. Read. Bathe. Whatever it is that you need to do, get grateful and work on getting your mindset right.

Luv Yourself

Hey there!!

While I try to stick to a super strict schedule, this week just threw me!! I am gonna take responsibility and I know that I am to blame, but I’ve been working on some anxiety (totally not used to feeling that way!) and it’s been a tough week.  But the tough parts are what make us stronger, right?  And I have been SO grateful for this opportunity to work with Lindsay Preston and be in this Life Luvers 21 Day Challenge.

I shared last week in my blog post that it was getting real and holy cow, how hard it was for me to put ME first more often!! If you’re new here, please read my first post on Life Coaching and what to expect from me weekly, as far as sharing my experience etc.

It’s all about fitting it in, no matter what and I really try to sit soak up each day’s lesson (hello forever a student of life!) and the more I work on my mind, I notice the better I want to take care of my body.  Note, the beet juice and protein waffle!

One thing Lindsay had us do before we even started the 21 Day Challenge, was taking this Strengths Finder quiz through Gallup.  My top five strengths came up as such:

I see these as strengths, but I’m not going to lie, I also immediately saw them as weaknesses too.  (Turns out that’s my Inner Mean Girl talking, so she needs to shhh!) But really, now the lesson to be had is how do I harness these strengths?  What can I do to use them to the best of my ability and really take myself to that next level?  She also gave us a bunch of tools to use to research our strengths, what they mean, and how to apply them to our life.  I have to giggle that “learner” is on there because while I know I am quite stern on the importance of education (not just formal education but learning anything in life!) this just re-affirmed it as well.

Another awesome tool Lindsay provided was the concept of a “Wins” Journal.  Each day, week, month, quarter, she says to sit down and write down your inside wins (changes inside yourself) and outside wins (changes outside of yourself).  Then, after you’ve taken the time to reflect and see your wins, the most important part is to celebrate.  Yup! How often do you let life pass you by without stopping to really soak that win up?

I took a photo of my cute journal next to my LV.  Sure it’s a pretty bag, but I’ve never shard why it means so much to me.  Last year we were working hard on selling quite a few houses and Joe was super busy working (legit no days off for like 20 days or something crazy!)  I sold one of the homes Rent to Own.  Granted, I do a lot of the calls etc in the biz, but this was different because not only did I go back forth with text messaging, phone calls, showing the house etc, but I also met with the couple and collected the deposit all by myself!  I went over the deal, explained everything and did it on the day my dad had a huge surgery (his lung removed from cancer.)   I was beyond nervous to do it all alone since Joe is usually the main talker, but I knew I had to jump in at some point.  I felt so proud afterwards!  This was a HUGE win looking back on it.  I reached a goal of selling a house, I overcame my personal fear of not being “good enough” at real estate investing to do it alone, I didn’t allow Joe not being there stop me, I was able to let go of limiting beliefs and provide an amazing couple with a home to live in! I gained so much confidence after this experience it was nuts.

What started out as a joke, turned into my purse.  I don’t collect a paycheck from our business, but I really work hard for us and wanted to earn this bag more than anything.   Looking back on it, I realized that I celebrated a win!  Now, this was clearly a big splurge and no I don’t go buy myself a new Louis for every home I sell (yet) but I do believe that counting your wins is important.  I don’t share my bag to boast, but simply to show that celebrating IS in fact so so important!  When we go out of our comfort zones and prove to ourselves that anything IS possible, think of how much further we can go?

Your celebrations can be smaller too, like giving yourself the gift of time for tea and a good book.  You can go grab a mani/pedi, or simply stroll the aisles of Target with a latté.  When we are intentional with our time and energy, and we begin celebrating ourselves more often, it will feel less icky.  I also believe it will lead to even more wins.

Another exercise was to find a photo of ourselves as a child.  I had my mom send me a bunch of photos via text and this one just stuck right out.  It’s who I am authentically!! This smile–the nose scrunch, the confident hands on the hips, messy long hair, happy eyes, healthy weight–it’s all who I am at my core.  Even the chubby cheeks, I still rock em.  I think I’m probably about Brooke’s age here, maybe 5-7? Not entirely sure.  This is the girl God made me to be, now I just need to work on bringing her to the surface as an adult more.

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Speaking of “authentic selves” if you are curious to see how close you are to being your authentic self, take this super short quiz Lindsay created! How Strong is Your Authentic Self? I am pretty close, but certainly have some areas to work on and improve.

Be sure to follow Linday on her social media pages, as she shares personal stuff on her insta-stories as well as lots of girl power, go get em, inspirational quotes on her FB and Instagram!

She also has a kick ass podcast you should listen to as well!

This journey is so good you guys; I knew it wasn’t going to be easy, as nothing worth having in life is, but I do feel like the more I keep pouring into myself and then putting myself out there, I am receiving back.  The abundance of love and gratitude I have for other amazing souls in my life is huge.  I’m really seeing who truly belongs in my life and those whom I cannot give so much time to.

Check back in next week as I share more progress and other tips and tricks Lindsay shares with us in our group!!  I hope you are enjoying seeing me breakdown things each week and talk about my journey. If you have any questions about life coaching or what I’m sharing, please don’t hesitate to ask! You can e-mail me, private message me on Instagram or FB or leave a comment.

Motivation Monday

Looking through my photos I see I have stocked up on come quoted once again! I figured a little motivation dump would be nice to share!

*Warning: there may be some adult language towards the end.

Have a fantastic week!!