Wellness Wednesday: Self Care (my list)

I’ve been a slacker lately.  I’ve been neglecting the most important person in my life.  I haven’t been speaking nicely to her, I haven’t been letting her have fun.  I’ve been stressing her out, making her feel less than, and putting everyone and everything before her.  In some ways, I’ve ripped some bandaids off of her that needed to come off, but also took away some vices that are no longer serving her.  She’s felt a little lost, confused, lonely, transitional.  She’s been so consumed filling her days with endless chores, work, tending to children, dogs, a sick husband.  I let her slip through the cracks of the day where I used to let her shine.  Instead of allowing joy and passion, I restricted her fun times and made sure she was constantly worrying and working.  Instead of breathing in positivity and love, and exhaling negative emotions and draining feelings, I made her spill her cup until it was no longer full…and she just kept pouring even though there seemed liked there was nothing left.  I didn’t even put her on the back burner, I took her completely off.  I stripped away parts of her that were not really what she wanted, and instead of filling her soul with what she craves, I pushed her harder into motherly duties, housework, and fatigue.  But do you know what friends? Our bodies, minds, hearts, and souls are all connected.  They know when something is off, when we are not living out our true abilities.  And I began to listen.  I started hearing the still small voice saying go to acupuncture, eat the right foods, move your body, write freely, spend time doing the things that you love.  It took awhile for it all to start to come together, and after a tearful breakdown before my kids’ birthday party, I realized something really had to change.

Mamas.  The weight of the world that we bear on our shoulders can be immense.  No matter if you’re working from home, working away from home, or simply working hard at being a mom, there are so many reasons we burn out.  Our bodies will tell us when something is off and mine has been trying to tell me for some time…but how often do we just push away our desires, feelings, thoughts, frustrations, needs, wants etc because we just simply don’t have the energy or the time?  Well that is not okay.  We need to pull out our calendars, our iPhones, our day planners and schedule it in.  Not just “me time” but sincerely put it into a time slot and prioritize yourself.  Then do it again.  Then again.  Then again.  Watch your health increase.  Your mood get happier.  Your life seem to get easier.

Don’t just say, “Oh when the kids go to bed I’ll take care of me,” because if you don’t have a plan, like me, I get to the end of my day and I just feel like a zombie.  I’ll pull up some distraction of sort, and scroll until my eyes cross.  Then I’ll just go to bed.  Wake up and repeat.

Not sure what to do? Stop right now and take out your phone or better yet a piece of paper or journal and write down at least 10-20 activities that you enjoy doing.  They can be free or they can be experiences that cost you money. I shared a list previously here on this post last year, as this was part of the process when I worked with Lindsay Preston my Life Coach.  Interestingly enough, I was just chatting with my friend and neighbor Katie earlier and she was saying how the Blogilates girl was sharing how her weight went down more when she was doing things for herself like taking dance lessons, getting massages etc.  We hear it all of the time, do more self-care–but self-care is NOT selfish and honestly should be one of the first things we schedule into our day.  Rachel Hollis even said she’s writing a book right now all about making your health a priority and to move your body every day for 30 minutes.

My current “do you time” aka self-care list:

  • Blogging
  • Reading
  • Journaling
  • Working out
  • Morning Routine
  • Actually playing with my kids (puzzles, outside, with their toys, video games, reading books, board games…)
  • Yoga
  • Dancing
  • Mani/Pedi
  • Massages
  • Facial
  • Tea time
  • Girl Time
  • Date Nights
  • Trips & Travel
  • Sipping a Starbucks drink in a Starbucks.
  • Cooking/baking
  • Detox Bath
  • Walk outside
  • Dates with Brooke
  • Dates with Bradley
  • The beach (Summer)

The point is we become so consumed with daily needs of the world and neglect ourselves.  And in my humble opinion, when I start taking everything so seriously and don’t allow myself to have fun, life feels so hard and isolating.  Now some of these can be bigger things like vacation or fancy spa days, and those are great incentives to work towards! Others are free and simple–they just require the time for us to do them.

You are the most important person in your life! Without your health, no one else can be taken care of.  I know there’s a ton of haters out there who think ‘self care’ or ‘self love’ is a joke, but don’t concern yourself with them.  I send them love from afar, and hope that one day they’ll value themselves as much as they should.  Once again, I always believe that those that don’t believe in self-improvement are those who probably need it the most.

I’ve been fairly consistent with my morning routine, and I do count that as self care as I enjoy journaling, writing in my planner, reading a motivational book and I’ve been trying to make more time for blogging.   I know waking up early is not easy, but once you start waking up 10 minutes, try 30, 45, then 60 minutes earlier than normal.  It will become a habit and honestly my day always flows so much better when I take “ME TIME” in my morning.

I love rolling on this “Peace” essential oil, sipping some green tea and writing in my journal.  Sometimes I write about what’s on my heart, what’s frustrating me, what I dream about, where I see myself one day…

I just write.

The point is, no matter how old you are, or where you are in life, you can always change and evolve.  The beauty of life is that you get to do what you want with it.  Silly, I know, but I tend to forget that.  It’s not my mom’s life, my husband’s life, my kids’ lives, it’s MINE.  How do I want to look back on my days? What did I do to make myself happy and smile?  I never claim to be perfect, I fail every day at something…but that’s the secret. Stop trying to be perfect and just be you.  Embrace it all. Do what you can with what you have and try to figure out what it is that you want.  Start small, but just start somewhere.

What’s one way you will take time to fill your soul this week?

Wellness Wednesday: Life Coaching

I think anyone who knows me, knows that I love bettering myself.  Anyone who truly knows me, realizes that I am not perfect and that I have a huge heart.  I love taking care of my family, being able to stay home with my children, run a beautiful home with two crazy dogs and cook meals all day long.  But at the end of every day, I still want to take care of ME.  Being a momma, running a real estate business and a wife to an extremely hard working man is a lot! I do a lot of it by myself, with the help of sitters and the occasional family member here or there.  While I have an abundant life and so many blessings, I don’t want “die with the music still inside of me.” That was a Wayne Dyer quote I heard many years ago.

I have big hopes, goals and dreams and Joe and I often joke we wonder if any of “it” will be enough.  We are never bored, we don’t watch TV, and we have this burning desire to seek so much more out of life.  What other businesses should we create? How many more people can we help? Where else can we travel to and experience new cultures?  We want to expose our children to so many beautiful opportunities.

My head spins and I have ALL OF THE THINGS I want to do before I die and where the heck do I even start?!

My mind starts going and I get started on some new adventure, and then I eventually shut down and back off.  Any time I start something just for me, I tend to implode. There wasn’t enough time, or the baby needed that, or our business this…

No more.

Enter in, Life Coaching.  Yup.  I am smack dab in the middle of week one and HOLY SMOKES have my eyes been opened up real wide.  So many things friends, so many things to tell you!  I’ve taken a few assessments and honestly have spent a lot of time with just myself.  (It’s weird and beautiful!) Some things I was well aware of (I’m an empathetic person) and other things I’ve begun to see like that I tend to self-sabotage, as I mentioned above.  I am starting with Lindsay’s 21 day course titled, Life Luvers. 

I’ll be honest, there have been a few uncomfortable moments.  There have already been a few times where a thought slips through my mind and I hear “Maybe you can’t do it.  Who do you think you are? What makes you special?”  And then I breathe in really deep, shove those negative comments aside and keep pushing.  And digging.  And thinking. And realizing: I can.

One of the road blocks I know I have is time, so I will be very aware of my social media usage, my ‘down time’ and I’ve already begun using timers.  I will use that pretty planner above and really hone in on when I can work on ME. Another area I want to work on is being okay with not being liked by others.  My mood ebbs and flows on this one.  Sometimes I don’t care and I say, do, and post what I want when I want.  Other times?  I worry, I think too much, I over analyze and become frozen. I go radio silent and into a weird space. I don’t want that to happen any more.

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I know it’s only the beginning of my little journey here but I am already seeing big strides.  I want to share as much as I can, as this blog has always been a wonderful outlet for me. I will share on my Instagram stories more as we continue going further into coaching.  I am in this for the long haul! I am putting it out here into the universe and holding myself accountable.

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Follow this “highlight” for more on my life coaching experience!! 

Yes, I am a wifey, a mama and a real estate investor, a reader, a writer, a life long learner…but mostly? I am a woman who, when on her deathbed, will look back and say, I did not die with my music still inside of me.  I lived my life to its fullest and truly followed my passions, lived calmly and peacefully, and with zero regrets.

If you’re wondering if coaching is for you, Lindsay has a free assessment you can take here!  I will be sharing weekly my progress here on the blog. I figured “Wellness Wednesday” will be a good fit and I’ll go into details about my wins, ‘a-ha’ moments and some struggles as much as I can.  I believe in being an open book, but I also know that sometimes I need to work through things by myself.

Have you done any life coaching?

New Beauty Faves

There’s something so simple and yet so satisfying by just lighting a candle.  No joke I picked this up at The Dollar Tree last Saturday.  I often feel as though my Throat Chakra is closed or at least partially blocked; I know that I need to speak more freely and say what’s on my heart more.  I lit the candle and dove into my newest mask obsession…

This Deep Clean Detox Mask by Ever smells SO amazing!! I am typically a sheet mask girl, but slathering this mask on with a brush makes me feel fancy and it literally smells like a spa treatment.  And it works!! I think I should do it 2x a week, but I’m lucky if I make time for myself once a week.  It really helps with clogged pores and small breakouts– especially if you’re like me and maybe forget to totally take off all your makeup from the day. OOPS.

I paint it on and then really “try” to relax for 10-20 minutes.  I then use a warm wet cloth to remove the mask.

I’ve also been using “purple shampoo” which seems to be all the rage right now to achieve that icy blonde look on the mane.   I saw this at Sephora and I chuckled at the name.  Bust your Brass.  It smells SO SO good and if you know me, I am huge on things having good scents.  It also leaves my hair super soft which I appreciate!

Post workout face (holy Zumba Strong!!), but check out that blonde hair!  This is a day after using this shampoo/conditioner.

I also just ordered my first Beauty Counter items!  I’ve heard amazing reviews on this company and their products and Joe’s cousin signed on with them.  I needed to replace my eye makeup remover, as I was running low on Mary Kay, and I thought I’d try it out.  SO happy that I did! It smells amazing and feels so refreshing, not oily and really works on removing mascara!  I also had to try a lippy because, well, I have a lipstick/gloss obsession.  I love this subtle mint flavor/feel.  It’s so hydrating too! I got the color “Brunch.” I will be shopping from Mary again soon!

 

What are some of your current beauty faves?!

Weekending

We had a busy week last week! Valentine’s Day brought little parties for both kids in schools, Joe working late and us attending a board meeting.  I did make a delicious lasagna for dinner and even both kids gave it “all the thumbs up!”

As for celebrating? I stopped into the Dollar Tree and scooped up just a few little goodies for our babes.  I knew they’d get a ton of candy at their V-Day parties, so I saw these adorable heart baskets, and filled them with a chocolate heart, a stuffed puppy, a little workbook and a balloon.  They loved it!  They even loved the workbooks; Brooke did hers right away and Bradley worked on his at lunch; he did a wonderful job tracing the words for each color!

Bradley did cry a little bit Friday morning saying his ear hurt, so my mom instinct kicked right in and I took him right into the Drs. Sure enough, he does have an ear infection.  I’m grateful it’s nothing crazy like the flu, but I know ear aches are awful!  Poor guy.

I am trying so hard carve out time to read our newest book club book. It’s a thriller and a page turner, but I can’t really read it at night–I don’t want nightmares!

  • Update: I actually was on page 77 Sunday night and decided to try and read a little…and well, I just stayed up until 1 am reading to finish it! If you love a page turning thriller, scoop this one right up!

Hubby and I did get out for our first date night of the year!! 2.16.19. We had not gone out since the weekend before Christmas, as he was so sick and life got crazy.  We had a delicious dinner at Good Luck and hit up our favorite spot, The Revelry for a few drinks.  We are old and were home by 11:30, but it was so nice to get dolled up, out of the house and having actual adult conversations!

Sunday brought some time for Brooke & Joe to spend together.  Since she’s gone to full day Kinder, she doesn’t get to see Joe that much and we could tell they needed some QT. She insisted that I took her and Bailey’s photo.

That left Mr. Bubs and I to cuddle on the couch. I hope he never gets to the point where he doesn’t want to snuggle!

He is all boy.  If he’s not dressed up as a superhero, running, crashing, shooting, jumping, then he’s tinkering with his trucks, cars and guys.

While Bradley played, I sat with the laptop and caught up on some blogs; I felt called to sit and write.  I have abandoned this little space here for some time, but I know that it always waits for me to return.  If you’re reading this, hello! Welcome if you are new, thank you for returning if you’ve been around for a bit.  Hubby swooped home to gift me with a Matcha Latté and it was divine.

I also worked on some advertising for our social media pages.  I’m on the fence about joining Rachel Hollis’ business coaching.  I really love her and I think I would learn so much!!

Recently a new BK went in around the corner from us.  The kids have been dying to check it out as they have literally watched it form from the ground up! I think they just love the crowns.

The rest of the day was relaxing, as you’re supposed to work 6 days and rest one.