Wellness Wednesday: Unstoppable Woman

I am woman, hear me ROAR!  Is it just me or does even the name of this course want to make you just jump up and scream?! In a good way of course.  Wowza ladies — I am entering into my 3rd week of The Become an Unstoppable Woman course with Lindsay Preston.  Can I just stop and say a few words?  And no, I’m not just blowing smoke, nor am I lying, but you guys, LIFE IS SO FREAKING GREAT!!!  Is it perfect?  Heck no.  I’m not looking for perfection though, I am working towards two (yup, just two!) goals at the moment.  These are my 90 Day Goals that I set with Lindsay on a personal VIP call with her.  (Totally worth every stinkin penny to get on that phone with this incredible woman!!)  Remember, a goal without an action is just a day dream. It’s important that your goals be measurable, attainable and within a time frame.

She took me step by step on crafting these goals.  The first goal kind of came out naturally as I had been thinking about it for a bit; I felt like it was something kind of gnawing at me from the inside out.  The second one took some time discussing with Lindsay thoughts that were swirling around in my mind.

My First Goal:

I will be able to communicate who I am at a level 10.  (scale 1-10) I will not hide/skirt around my needs/wants/desires.  At the end of 90 days I will be FREE TO BE ME.  I will live in my authentic voice and not worry about what others think about me. Right now I feel like my communication about me is at a 6; I am uncomfortable celebrating WINS and truly share what’s on my heart at times.

Mantra:  I am free to be me. 

My Second Goal:

By the end of Unstoppable, I’ll be at a 10 with my time management.  I will feel less chaotic, and there will be a flow with my days.  I currently feel like I’m at a 3– feeling unproductive, flying around the house/driving here, there and everywhere trying to keep up with everyone and everything with very little time “for me.”

Mantra:  My time is valuable. 

It took me some time to think of a good mantra, because I wanted it to be short and sweet, as well as effective!! I have noticed GREAT improvements with my mind just by repeating the original mantra I came up with in the Life Luvers course, I am worthy.  

{Remember you can still use code: JENN20 and save $20 and grab the Life Luvers course for just $77!!}

I will be totally honest and say that I kind of thought mantras were dumb.  I have tried affirmations before but they didn’t really do much for me and never really made me feel any different.  The only thing I can attribute this current success is that Lindsay’s course took me through a process (which is backed by neuroscience!) to really delve into my inner beliefs, subconscious thoughts and figure out why the heck I feel stuck!!

In module 1 we really discussed the need to write more.  Like a lot more.  Like every. Single. Day. More. 30+ minutes you should write and reflect.

Did you know writing can:

  • increase self awareness and you’ll feel less crappy?
  •  increase your thinking ability and you’ll be more authentic
  • “get you out of your own head”
  • reduce stress
  • open yourself up to self-love/compassion

I find it very odd when people don’t want to love on themselves, or think about what it is they truly want.  The biggest and most important relationship you can have is with yourself.  (I’m sure some will roll their eyes and say, no it should be with God but I’m not here to have a religious debate) and that’s fine.  But if God’s first, I sure hope you’re a super close second.  No one will be with you, in your mind, in your heart, and for the rest of YOUR LIFE.  If you’re unhappy, jealous, insecure, frustrated, feeling like the world is out to get your, mad at this person, ticked off about that…then you’ve got some work to do girlfriend. The good news? You don’t have to do it alone.

If anyone tells you that you shouldn’t work on you or ‘do you’ or spend time with yourself, I AM CALLING MAJOR BS!! That person most likely has some severe (and I mean SEVERE) IMG (inner mean girl) issues that she has not nor is ready to address.  I will say that it has been super hard for me to put myself first, as a mom and wife to a very busy/hard working man, I often leave myself off the to-do list.  I may not take the time to meal prep to eat like I should, invest time at the gym/exercise, enjoy quiet time with a book, write in my journal, tap my fingers on these old keys…and since taking Lindsay’s courses, something major has happened.  I feel as though I’m becoming who I am truly meant to be.

Another tool that’s been SO useful is what Lindsay refers to as “Do You Time.”

  • it is not selfish
  • it is needed
  • it is more than okay to prioritize yourself

My list of “do you time” includes things like:

  • Zumba class
  • blogging
  • reading
  • cooking/baking
  • walks outside
  • tea time
  • long hot shower
  • specific playlists (soft jazz or even some gangsta rap, depending on my moods!)
  • spa day
  • slowing down
  • taking photos

I’m so excited for this continued journey and am going to be opening up more on my next post about my personal ‘bullet holes’ aka, limiting beliefs that are causing me to not progress further.  They’re not fun to talk about, bring up, or even think about, but I am sharing my story here in hopes that it inspires another woman to be able to work more on herself.

I’ve been truly connecting with a divine presence lately and feel as though I am called to be more vulnerable, authentic and share some of my pains/hurts in hopes that it helps others.  If I can help even just one more woman out there, then I know my words here are not useless.  I am here to inspire, that is all!

(Sneak peek:  My timeline of my memories starts with me being born in 1981, my family, attending college 1999-2003, landing my dream job teaching, my parents’ divorce, a bad relationship/breakup, meeting my now husband, my Master’s degree, parental drama, and much more! I will reveal some of my ‘bullet holes’ from these memories.)

Don’t forget that Lindsay offers a free assessment for you to see if you’d be a good match to work with her and become a Life Luver or even better, an Unstoppable Woman! If you have any questions don’t hesitate to e-mail me jenndellefave@gmail and I’ll happily share more thoughts on this life coaching experience.

Weekend Love

Happy Memorial Day!

It was a gorgeous weekend here weather wise!  The 585 has finally broken its streak of rain and cold.  It may almost be June but we are so grateful that the sun has arrived and to get outside and feel its magical powers!

I hit up a Zumba class first thing Friday morning and then headed over to grab my niece for the weekend.  These three goofballs had SO much fun together and got along so nicely.

Joe had off so we took them to the Zoo (which Joe and I honestly don’t love seeing the animals caged up not living their in their natural habitats…but it is exciting to show the kids exotic animals.)

I have some exciting news to share too!  My friend Cathy with Tastefully Simple asked me (one of two!) people to do a 14 Day Reset Beta testing.  It’s a low carb meal plan and they provide all the recipes, snacks and menu plan!  I paid $150 for TS products (which I already know that I love!) and I will have to grocery shop for produce and meats etc.   I cannot wait to document and share my experience!

I took these three monkeys to the mall so that the girls could get matching outfits.  Of course they had just had lunch before we left, but were still HUNGRY for pretzels!

They also picked out a BFF necklace–do any of you remember these?! LOL

I felt a little bad because bubs wanted in on all the action, but as you may know, girls just have a special bond and secret handshakes.  I know he’ll have a buddy one day too, but he was always asking to be included and “take my picture too” it was so sweet.

In other news, my sister Brianna had her first Body Building competition!  She placed 3rd and although I couldn’t be there, I cheered her on in spirit! So proud of you girl!

The kids jumping for joy that Aunt Bri placed!

Saturday night I took some “do you time” in the kitchen.  I had my group coaching call and brought up one of my memories that had ‘bullet holes’ so it was important that I spent some time enjoying.  I’ll be sharing more on my bullet holes soon! Stay tuned!

I cooked up a bunch of veggies, peeled, sliced & roasted potatoes and had a pot roast in the crockpot.  I enjoyed some of my favorite (inexpensive) Pinto Grigio Cavitt and played some tunes.  The kitchen has always been my happy place and cooking/chopping/sautéing/stirring is always so therapeutic to me.

Joe got home from work and Brooke’s been practicing to ride her bike without training wheels.  She’s making it a bit of a distance before she tumbles, but I snapped this shot because it just makes me so happy.  Even though he’s still in his work clothes, he jumped right out of his truck to try and help her.  THIS is the man I married–ALL IN!  He doesn’t care that his nice Banana Republic clothes could get ruined.

We also had a little spa night!  I grabbed a few face masks and put them on the girls–Brooke thought it was the best thing ever!

Sunday we wore the Old Navy dresses! I actually scooped mine up last year, and the girls honestly picked theirs out first and I then said, I have one just like it! They were so excited to all match and it made for quite the photo!  We hit up The Revelry for Brunch.

How cute are they?

I told hubby we needed a selfie.

Again, Bradley wanting to be in on the action!

And what’s a #brunch without a mimosa? Just sayin.

Adri went home and we took a little Sunday drive.  The bay was a little cool, but it was so pretty out.

He’s always loved standing on rocks…

My sweet girl.  She actually got to feed them as some nice girls next to us had a big bag of bird seed/food to share.

Joe had to work all day Memorial Day but I enjoyed my time with the kiddos.  I had my coaching call in the morning (made sure to grab a Starbucks Latté so I could focus/recall alllll the bullet holes) and then we hit up a park, grocery store and did household chores.  Nothing crazy, and I felt rather depleted after recalling some ridiculous stuff I’ve been through.  We all have, I’m no different.  I’ll be opening up more on all that in the upcoming week, so if you’ve been feeling like learning more about the life coaching journey, stay tuned! I’m going to be as open and transparent as I can be!!

Have a beautiful week my friends.

Vlog: Being Kind and Doing You

I felt like sharing what was on my mind via a vlog the other day.  Fresh from the gym, super motivated to live my best life and I thought maybe someone would need to hear these words.  We are not perfect, no one is.  Isn’t life just about better than you were yesterday?  In a world where everyone is so quick to judge and tear one another down, I have been really looking inside myself and working towards being the best Jenn that I can be.  It’s really that simple friends.

 

Have a beautiful Thursday!

Luv Yourself

Hey there!!

While I try to stick to a super strict schedule, this week just threw me!! I am gonna take responsibility and I know that I am to blame, but I’ve been working on some anxiety (totally not used to feeling that way!) and it’s been a tough week.  But the tough parts are what make us stronger, right?  And I have been SO grateful for this opportunity to work with Lindsay Preston and be in this Life Luvers 21 Day Challenge.

I shared last week in my blog post that it was getting real and holy cow, how hard it was for me to put ME first more often!! If you’re new here, please read my first post on Life Coaching and what to expect from me weekly, as far as sharing my experience etc.

It’s all about fitting it in, no matter what and I really try to sit soak up each day’s lesson (hello forever a student of life!) and the more I work on my mind, I notice the better I want to take care of my body.  Note, the beet juice and protein waffle!

One thing Lindsay had us do before we even started the 21 Day Challenge, was taking this Strengths Finder quiz through Gallup.  My top five strengths came up as such:

I see these as strengths, but I’m not going to lie, I also immediately saw them as weaknesses too.  (Turns out that’s my Inner Mean Girl talking, so she needs to shhh!) But really, now the lesson to be had is how do I harness these strengths?  What can I do to use them to the best of my ability and really take myself to that next level?  She also gave us a bunch of tools to use to research our strengths, what they mean, and how to apply them to our life.  I have to giggle that “learner” is on there because while I know I am quite stern on the importance of education (not just formal education but learning anything in life!) this just re-affirmed it as well.

Another awesome tool Lindsay provided was the concept of a “Wins” Journal.  Each day, week, month, quarter, she says to sit down and write down your inside wins (changes inside yourself) and outside wins (changes outside of yourself).  Then, after you’ve taken the time to reflect and see your wins, the most important part is to celebrate.  Yup! How often do you let life pass you by without stopping to really soak that win up?

I took a photo of my cute journal next to my LV.  Sure it’s a pretty bag, but I’ve never shard why it means so much to me.  Last year we were working hard on selling quite a few houses and Joe was super busy working (legit no days off for like 20 days or something crazy!)  I sold one of the homes Rent to Own.  Granted, I do a lot of the calls etc in the biz, but this was different because not only did I go back forth with text messaging, phone calls, showing the house etc, but I also met with the couple and collected the deposit all by myself!  I went over the deal, explained everything and did it on the day my dad had a huge surgery (his lung removed from cancer.)   I was beyond nervous to do it all alone since Joe is usually the main talker, but I knew I had to jump in at some point.  I felt so proud afterwards!  This was a HUGE win looking back on it.  I reached a goal of selling a house, I overcame my personal fear of not being “good enough” at real estate investing to do it alone, I didn’t allow Joe not being there stop me, I was able to let go of limiting beliefs and provide an amazing couple with a home to live in! I gained so much confidence after this experience it was nuts.

What started out as a joke, turned into my purse.  I don’t collect a paycheck from our business, but I really work hard for us and wanted to earn this bag more than anything.   Looking back on it, I realized that I celebrated a win!  Now, this was clearly a big splurge and no I don’t go buy myself a new Louis for every home I sell (yet) but I do believe that counting your wins is important.  I don’t share my bag to boast, but simply to show that celebrating IS in fact so so important!  When we go out of our comfort zones and prove to ourselves that anything IS possible, think of how much further we can go?

Your celebrations can be smaller too, like giving yourself the gift of time for tea and a good book.  You can go grab a mani/pedi, or simply stroll the aisles of Target with a latté.  When we are intentional with our time and energy, and we begin celebrating ourselves more often, it will feel less icky.  I also believe it will lead to even more wins.

Another exercise was to find a photo of ourselves as a child.  I had my mom send me a bunch of photos via text and this one just stuck right out.  It’s who I am authentically!! This smile–the nose scrunch, the confident hands on the hips, messy long hair, happy eyes, healthy weight–it’s all who I am at my core.  Even the chubby cheeks, I still rock em.  I think I’m probably about Brooke’s age here, maybe 5-7? Not entirely sure.  This is the girl God made me to be, now I just need to work on bringing her to the surface as an adult more.

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Speaking of “authentic selves” if you are curious to see how close you are to being your authentic self, take this super short quiz Lindsay created! How Strong is Your Authentic Self? I am pretty close, but certainly have some areas to work on and improve.

Be sure to follow Linday on her social media pages, as she shares personal stuff on her insta-stories as well as lots of girl power, go get em, inspirational quotes on her FB and Instagram!

She also has a kick ass podcast you should listen to as well!

This journey is so good you guys; I knew it wasn’t going to be easy, as nothing worth having in life is, but I do feel like the more I keep pouring into myself and then putting myself out there, I am receiving back.  The abundance of love and gratitude I have for other amazing souls in my life is huge.  I’m really seeing who truly belongs in my life and those whom I cannot give so much time to.

Check back in next week as I share more progress and other tips and tricks Lindsay shares with us in our group!!  I hope you are enjoying seeing me breakdown things each week and talk about my journey. If you have any questions about life coaching or what I’m sharing, please don’t hesitate to ask! You can e-mail me, private message me on Instagram or FB or leave a comment.

Wellness Wednesday: Trusting the Process

Well, 8 days in and ish started getting hard.

I was able to keep up with most of my coaching work on a daily basis, despite going away to Toronto.  Luckily we had some down time in our gorgeous suite in the hotel.  I plugged in my headphones and made it work! It’s so so easy to quit when things get hard, but I promised myself to focus these 21 days and get it done!

My overall goal is to create a better work/life blend and to not be so stressed out and feel so chaotic.  I don’t like the stress that it creates and neither does my body!  I absolutely love my life, but I don’t like feeling spun out of control.

So how am I doing with that?  Ehhhh to be totally transparent and honest, I don’t feel like I’m doing that great.  I yelled Tuesday. (So much for being calm amongst the chaos).  I felt like that meme where Mary Poppins is all, “Let’s go!” and then 20 minutes later Batman voice yells “LET’S GOOOOOO!!”  It was a crazy early morning as Bradley had his final “Helper Day” at preschool, which I still had to buy snacks/drinks for AND I had his parent conference at 8:30.  Since I had made a choice to go to a favorite workout class the night before at 6pm, it made for a later bedtime.  I solo parent on some evenings as per my husband’s schedule, and for the last 6 years, I pretty much let the kids’ dictate my routine.  Well, since I’ve started putting ME first a few times more, it’s an adjustment for ALL.  I sometimes feel counter-productive, as in maybe if I just do what is always best for kids and husband, then I can keep the peace…but the reality is, I feel like I’ve woken up to a new light.  What if I die tomorrow? Did I get to do what I wanted to do?  I get that being a parent is all about selfless-ness and giving, giving, giving even when you don’t feel like giving any more, but I also see the need to fill my cup.

I used to think filling my cup was a once in awhile thing.  But I’m realizing I do need to give more attention to me, a lot more.  The “Do You List” has been SO helpful.  It’s been eye opening because I’ve noticed that I don’t feel guilty when I do the dishes, fold the laundry, clean the rooms, scrub the toilets, braid the hair, brush the teeth, iron the work clothes, cook the eggs, do the grocery shopping, prepare the meals, walk the dog, work on real estate, cuddle…but when I consistently do things that make me, just Jenn, not anyone else, happy, I feel bad. So I am learning to push through that uncomfortable feeling and see where it takes me. ** This is what Lindsay would refer to as your IMG (Inner Mean Girl) I didn’t think I had any (haha!) but once I listened to her videos, took notes and reflected I realized I am so a people pleaser and then some.

I’ve created my daily habit of meditating 5 minutes in the morning and 5 minutes at night.  I find the morning to be harder than night–I actually love listening to a meditation and falling into a nice quiet sleep…I am also noticing perhaps I would do better with a mid-day meditation?  I may play around with this.  My morning routine is not exactly pristine.  My body is fighting me for sleep!! (I’m blaming the uber hard workouts I do some days!) Either way, I am seeing the need for it. Slowing down is helping me A LOT!

I’ve also started saying a daily mantra: I live a calm and intentional life.  (I’m finding Rachel Hollis’ Start Today Journal methods kind of intertwining here!) Basically, you say things in present tense, as if they’re already happening.  There’s a huge brain connection (I’m not getting scientific here, but there’s huge research done on this!) Lindsay does a great job at explaining it in her course, so it’s not all hokey!

So all in all, in just a week I’m noticing huge differences! Even though I felt like I was struggling a bit yesterday (Tuesday) I love that Lindsay has a closed Facebook group where we can share our thoughts.  We were to share what we are grateful for, so I did, but I also was real and said how things were getting hard.  Her response, “I know you want things to change now, but it’s a process. Just keep showing up like you’re doing (even though you feel overwhelmed I know) and it will get better.”  I know that I needed to hear that because I always want to rush things and sometimes, most times, we need to let things go at their own pace and fall into place as they will.  I know I’m so, SO hard on myself and I need to lighten up (a lot.)

All amazing things happen outside of our comfort zone, right?  Well I am certainly stepping out of mine and cannot wait to see what’s to come.  Just don’t quit, right?